Friday, 17 February 2012

Today I am the Ocean, Where is my Clarity?


How do I help myself to be all that I wish to be? What is it that I wish to be? I wish to be whole and unravelled in my entirety, I wish for clarity, simple understanding, and peacefulness with my life exactly the way it is right now.

It's not a lot to ask for but I seem to be constantly baffled by my current inability to remember all the aspects of maintaining a peaceful mind. Each day the element which I need to hold my centre is seems as different as the clouds in the sky from day to day, and some days I find that essential ingredient, the piece of the puzzle which I need to finish the picture, my day flows ahead of me, I smile, doors open and my heart dances. On others I search all day long for the key which unlocks my heart, until finally when I had almost given up it appears as if it had been there all the time, I open the door and the sun shines brightly on the creation of my life and I relax, back in the flow.

When I find the answer, the simple ingredient to align all the flavours I vow never to forget it, I will have it tattoo'd on my arm so I can refer to it whenever I feel lost, I send it to myself in text messages, I email myself the truth, I write it on bits of paper and stick it on the wall of my bathroom. I feel sure.
Next morning I wake up and it is gone again!

I read the texts and emails, I scour the pieces of paper, but the wisdom of yesterday is not always the panacea of today, yesterday I was the Ocean, today I am the Sky, tomorrow I may be the Stars and the day after perhaps I will be the Trees. Everyday the answer is simple but most days it eludes me for a time.

I congratulate myself for my successes again each small success I have, and if it is only just before I fall asleep last thing at night that I find the blessing which brings me peace then so be it, I have success.

I must say the loving words that I wish to hear, and I must say them to myself, I and only I know the words I long to hear, and they are meaningless until I say them.

        I love myself, I am beautiful, I am intelligent, I am kind. 
      My life is important, I am a fantastic mother, I am generous. 
           I bring joy to the world, I am special, I am inspiring. 
                                     I love myself.
                                          I love.

Some days I re-read my blog and I am amazed at the words I have written, I am pleased to be able to help myself by reading my own writings.

Today is the forty ninth day I have written my blog, that is seven whole weeks, I am quite impressed that I have managed to keep doing it. I am still devoted to finding peace in my heart, I am dedicated to maintaining an attitude of gratitude and I am feeling very pleased that I have worked and stuck at keeping my hands and my heart in the sunshine.

I am still CHOOSING GOOD FEELING THOUGHTS as much as I can because I believe that it is a valid important method of recognising the beauty of the world. We have so much to contend with when we come to our physical lives, there is so much negativity in the world, and seemingly so much addiction to negativity, being positive despite it all is one big challenge......

If by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you 
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, 
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, 
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating, 
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, 
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken, 
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, 
And lose, and start again at your beginnings 
And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you 
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, 
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch, 
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, 
If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run- 
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, 
And  - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

"You are supposed to thrive, you are supposed to feel good, you are good, you are loved, Well being is constantly flowing to you, if you allow it it will manifest in all manner of ways in your experience." (Abraham - Hicks)

Today I feel grateful for inspiring poetry
I feel grateful for my blog
I feel grateful for my will to be a success at being Me
I feel grateful for lemons
I feel grateful for all the people in the world working to change for the better for everyone
I feel grateful for all the trees near my house
I feel grateful for my beautiful children
I feel grateful for my hands
I feel grateful for my healthy heart
I feel grateful for inspirational stories

love Klara. 

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