Well today I am so tired that I can't really even think anymore. I have no idea what to write about! When I am this tired I am very vulnerable to poor thought patterns, my defences are down, and I have to continuously remind myself that I am simply tired!
So here is what I am going to do, first I am going to try this:
This produced a lot of yawning! and if I had more than an hour to get this finished I would probably do it a few more times. The yawning is good, apparently it signifies an energy release, actually now that I have got going I am starting to feel a bit better. People keep telling me I must be tired, what with having a small baby and two other growing girls. I wonder why that is? I don't feel that tired most of the time, I admit, I'm really not having trouble getting to sleep, baby drops off, I close my eyes; I am asleep. Maybe I have started to believe all the people telling me I am tired? Maybe I am tired? Maybe I'm just a bit bonkers, it could all simply be pre-birthday lunacy.
What on Earth is really going on? Will we ever find out? What happens when we die? Will there be a Monty Python-esq moment where someone comes out with a clip board and pencil, ticks off a few things and hands over some sort of receipt record of how we did?
Well I don't think it really matters, what does matter is that I find peace and happiness while I am alive. When I say find, I don't mean that I am going in search of it because I know it is here somewhere, inside me. I have found it before plenty of other times.
Sometimes it feels a bit like my brain is like some sort of labyrinth, and I must learn all the twists and turns by heart so that I can always find my way back to the peaceful happy place which I am nurturing right at the middle. Every so often I lose my way in the labyrinth and I stumble around like Winnie the Pooh with a honey jar on his head crashing into the walls and generally making a terrible racket (you know the story where piglet thinks he has found a hefalump!). Pooh bear got that jar on his head because he ate all the honey out of it .........
Anyway thankfully like Pooh, one of my friends and relations usually comes to my rescue in the end, if I haven't already got the jar off my head by myself! Happiness is here in my heart, all I really have to do is say 'No' to all the rubbish which my mind likes to present me with, and a truly hearty "Yes" to all the thoughts which feel good, of which there are many.
Remembering that thoughts recreate themselves in their own likeness (a bit like the exponential growth of bacteria) is helpful to me, the initial effort of shifting my focus to a good feeling thought is rewarded by a domino cascade into the beauty and wonder of walking the planet we call Earth!
If the fish are happy thoughts, and each week a few minutes, I particularly like the music, and the fact that someone went to the trouble of making this video!
So that was it, the sum total of what it took to shift my focus from "I'm tired, I can't think of anything good to say, I feel low" to " I feel good, I have found my humour, I can share what I know of love and happiness".
The hard part for me was the initial movement from low feelings into the action, in other words getting started; Motivation.
Of course I can only speak for myself, but the hardest part of moving from poor feeling thoughts to feeling great is finding the willingness to try! The facility in my mind which says there is no point, or that it won't work, I cannot shift, is quite persuasive.
I think I will learn to believe in myself, to listen to the quiet voice which is saying "step into the light, feel the beauty and the warm breeze" and turn my back on the boring old voice of misery gloom and doom. Now is where it's at! Now is all we have. Let us all choose happiness right now, for tomorrow never comes!
Today I am Thankful for my daughters and their insights
Today I am Thankful for the people who upload great videos
Today I am Thankful for my sense of smell
Today I am Thankful for delicious cooking smells
Today I am Thankful for the joy in my heart
Today I am Thankful for the greatness that is within us all
Today I am Thankful for people who love to share
Today I am Thankful for the sky
Today I am Thankful for the smell of freshly dug earth
Today I am Thankful for earthworms